posted Feb-22-2006 04:24 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MikeMills:
Wow - to just stumble upon a legendary beer joint out in the country...

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Of course, if she had gone here first she wouldn't have had to stumble around. But what fun is that really???

http://beermapping.com/maps/bostonbeer.html

Yes, there's a Philly one as well:

http://beermapping.com/maps/phillybeer.html

Oooooh, I can do a satellite picture, too!!!

I'm such a map geek!!!

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posted Feb-22-2006 04:28 PM            

MM – Where are we going?
Randymar – It’s a virtual trip, we can go anywhere.
MM – Let’s go to Heavenly Valley
LT – Okay then, but only if we go on the Nevada side.
Randymar – A state where gambling and strip clubs are legal? I’m there.
MM – LT, you sound as if you know what you’re talking about.
LT – yep, been skiing about 35 years and used to hang out there, but I really do ski slowly. Slow as, well, like a turtle.

The trio hit the slopes -

LT – you two may want to go ahead; I really am a slow skier.
Randymar – I’m a surfer, babe, never really skied before. I think that I’ll start out slow with you.
MM – Well I did go cross-country skiing a couple of time through Yorkshire once. Beautiful country side. They serve an ale there that one can only experience at the source. It may be the water used or the proximately to the hops. It has a creamy head that one should really site and admire for 20 minutes or so before taking that first sip. It doesn’t travel well, but then again Smuttynose would not make it to Yorkshire in good shape either. One should really …
Randymar – ahem. Simon, do you think we could possibly get a couple of runs in here?

After the first run –

MM – Where is LT?
Randymar – She must have passed us. I think she was deceiving us with the “slow skier” act. Well, well, well look what I see over there.

Sitting on an Adirondack chair, strapping on her boots is indeed a strapping young woman. She is tall wearing a red fleece and has braids down to her waist. Randy is contemplating those braids as he heads over. Thinking this must require some note worthy manual dexterity, to plait them as evenly as she has. He sits down next to her and gazes at the ground for a moment and ponders whether she braids them daily or every few days. He lifts his head in time to see her pass by and head toward her skis. Only to have her seat now occupied by yet another fetching woman, also in a red fleece and braids. Her braids are not quite as long or impressive, but she has a lovely Australian accent and has offered her ski services to Randy. She invites him to join her on the Black Diamond trails, but warns him about the 15 minute chair lift. No one quite knows what happened on that chair lift, only that those involved thoroughly enjoyed themselves and that they accomplished feats never done before on a chair lift and stand a good chance of not being repeated again.

MM – Looks like he got another one. How does he do it???

Mike loses his train of thought while pondering the design aspect of the signage. He is soon run into by a novice skier. In fact, she topples him. He apologizes - of course he does, he’s British.

Novice – Oh, you’re British. Aren’t you cute! Marly, come meet my new friend.
Marly – Shannon, Shelia and Sharon – come on over.
Shannon – You look like that musician, you know…
MM – You mean…
Sheila – Is it Social Distortion?
Marly – Maybe Duran, Duran?
Novice – I know – Mike Mills!
Shannon – That’s it. Hey Mike, come on, we’re heading back up.
Finding himself suddenly the object of attention, Mike wonders “What would Randy do?”

La Tortuga finally finishes her run, in time for lunch. As luck would happen and only can on a virtual ski trip, the three friends hook up over chili, French fries and Pilsner Urquell.

Randymar – Seriously LT, in all this time you only skied one run?
MM – What about your 35 years experience.
LT – Yep, 35 years and have always skied the same. Same easy runs, same speed and same posture. I keep waiting for some ski instructor, cute wouldn’t hurt here and maybe named Jean Claude, to take pity on me and show me some pointers.
Randymar – Well good luck to you, but it might help if you didn’t wear 5 layers of clothes and a hat like the ones worn in Fargo.
MM – Wait, I thought you were a lesbian.

The tired trio has a hearty laugh, drain their beer and head back to their homes.

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posted Feb-22-2006 04:29 PM            

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posted Feb-22-2006 04:30 PM            

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posted Feb-22-2006 04:32 PM            

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posted Feb-22-2006 04:41 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by randymar:
It won't be the same, Muffin.

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Hey, you're not playing favorites, are you...

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posted Feb-22-2006 04:46 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by randymar:
And, nicely done, by the way.

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Right on. We need more of those stories. Is it my turn? Okay, I'll need a few days. Can I make Happy Fun Ball a character?

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posted Feb-23-2006 08:55 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MikeMills:
Hey, you're not playing favorites, are you...

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She brings certain attributes, certain qualities, that you and I don't enjoy. I mean we enjoy them, we just don't have them.

As a woman, see things from a refreshingly different perspective - you and I kind of look at things the same; you just apologize more.

RM - "This beer has a nice hoppiness, just a little bit sweeter than the other one. The babe on the label doesn't hurt either."

MM - "I'm sorry but I'm getting a bit of orange and coriander as well. I'm not keen on the typeface."

LT - "Look how pretty the sun shines through the glass!"

Don't get me wrong, she knows her sh!t, but she's not realbeer.com competitive about it. She just has a total enjoyment, and isn't into the "I had this, I had this, I want that!" scorekeeping aspect of things.

Every now and then, you and I want to flex our Alpha Male muscles - it's our nature. She just sits back, giggles at us, waves "Have fun trying to impress me, boys" and enjoys her book and her pint.

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posted Feb-23-2006 09:02 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MikeMills:
Is it my turn?

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Well, let' see ...

LT posted two here, she's got another one ready to go; I posted mine to "400 Beers" (for good reason) and also have another one nearly ready (I need to make sure I'm not using first-person present-tense anywhere ... I HATE that!); so, yes, I guess the bet is to you.

If you're going to write another depressing, introspective, self-loathing piece like the one you did for HackWriters ...

FOLD.

[This message has been edited by randymar (edited Feb-23-2006).]

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posted Feb-23-2006 09:42 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by randymar:
She just sits back, giggles at us, waves "Have fun trying to impress me, boys" and enjoys her book and her pint.

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Yeah, I tired that once. Didn't get a good response.

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posted Feb-23-2006 09:50 AM               

quote:

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Originally posted by randymar:
If you're going to write another depressing, introspective, self-loathing piece like the one you did for HackWriters ...

FOLD.

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I was in my blue period then. I've matured since those days: grown a beard and become more introspective. I'm more Byron-esque in style now.

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posted Feb-23-2006 09:52 AM               

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posted Feb-23-2006 11:02 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MikeMills:
... grown a beard and become more introspective.

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Great. That's ALL we need!!!

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posted Feb-23-2006 11:27 AM            

quote:

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Jan 18, 2006 - Catholics in Lithuania are upset a brewery is using Jesus Christ in its advertisements.

The Catholic Church condemned beermaker Kalnapilio-Tauro Grupe for using a picture of Jesus wearing earphones to advertise its products. "Many believers are hurt and outraged that the savior's image ... was used for advertising beer," said Archbishop Sigitas Tamkevicius.

"The use of Catholic symbols for commercial purposes and especially for advertising alcoholic beverages is absolutely unjustifiable," said Tamkevicius.

The televised advertisements show an image of Jesus wearing earphones. Customers are urged to buy the beer for a chance to win a CD containing musical hits.

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Funny, I don't see anyone burning Lithuanian flags.

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posted Feb-23-2006 01:57 PM               

quote:

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Originally posted by randymar:
Funny, I don't see anyone burning Lithuanian flags.

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Hey, you're not lisping again, are you?

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posted Feb-23-2006 02:00 PM               

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posted Feb-23-2006 02:45 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by randymar:
What would Jesus drink?

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Wine, duh!

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posted Feb-23-2006 02:50 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by La Tortuga:
Really? Tell me more - what is it?

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From beer advocate:

quote:

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overall: 4.1
appearance: 4 | smell: 4 | taste: 4 | mouthfeel: 4 | drinkability: 5

A cloudy amber beer with a creamy sticky head. Quite the floral aroma with that distinct spicy, raw, citrus and leafy character of East Kent Goldings. Flavour is near sugary sweet, malty and smooth on the palate with a balancing leafy tea-like hop character with a nice woody bite.

A damn fine IPA, and one of the best in MA. This IPA really appeals to me because it shows off both a big malt and big hop character, but the beer is so in balance and the flavours are so smoothed together.

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quote:

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overall: 4.2
appearance: 4 | smell: 5 | taste: 4 | mouthfeel: 4 | drinkability: 4

Presentation: 22 oz. brown bottle. Picture of the two brewers lost in the desert in a boat … hence “Lost Sailor”. Freshness date marked.

Appearance: Deep orange amber with a slight chill haze which is common for this beer, with a moderate pour it formed a tiny bubbled two fingered head … that shows the quality of the brew.

Smell: Sweet to the nose of flowery fruity hop oil and a pale malt back ground. Slight minty aroma also from the hops, very aromatic.

Taste: Muscular medium body with a light carbonation and smooth mouth feel that throws a handful of crispness in the mouth. Round malt palate of pale malt sweetness and toasted grain, faint esters leave a mild berry fruitiness behind. Hops a quite prevalent though certainly not overbearing, bitterness is marked to balance and produces a wonderful hop flavour of sweet floral, hop leaf and a pinch of earth. Hop flavour and remnants of toasted grain faded very so softly into the finish.

Notes: One of the better domestic English Style IPAs I have had in a long time, well balanced and poised as a session beer.

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And it's served on tap at Rafters.

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posted Feb-23-2006 02:58 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by MikeMills:
Is that your first lager? Good luck, man!

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Not at all. The first beer I made was a Marzen. I've done Pilsners, Octoberfests (my favorite style), Bocks and Dunkles.

I couldn't do them when I was in Texas (did a steam beer though) but now that I am in the great white northeast it's not a problem. I have an unused bedroom that has it's own heat source. So I turn the heat off and it stays below fifty.

[This message has been edited by therealman (edited Feb-23-2006).]

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posted Feb-23-2006 03:05 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by therealman:
Taste: Muscular medium body with a light carbonation and smooth mouth feel that throws a handful of crispness in the mouth. Round malt palate of pale malt sweetness and toasted grain, faint esters leave a mild berry fruitiness behind. Hops a quite prevalent though certainly not overbearing, bitterness is marked to balance and produces a wonderful hop flavour of sweet floral, hop leaf and a pinch of earth. Hop flavour and remnants of toasted grain faded very so softly into the finish

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WTF kind of a beer review is that???

There's no plot, no time or place setting, no character development, no tension, no mystery.

I'm actually glad that you just copied someone else's rating, because we all know you're capable of so much more.

[This message has been edited by randymar (edited Feb-23-2006).]

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posted Feb-23-2006 03:55 PM            

Some years ago – never mind how long precisely – my wife and I took a day trip out to Lancaster, PA, with my mom, my brother and his wife. To be truthful, she wasn’t even D’Wife yet, just some chick I met in a bar; who lived in Jersey; whom I could mooch rides down to the shore with. The five of us were in my brother’s Crown Vic: Donna between me and Mom in the back; Jeff in front of me, at the wheel.

As we were returning on PA Rt 30., we passed one of those quintessential Amish buggies. The driver was in full “Witness” mode, with the back pants, blue shirt, suspenders and straw hat.

My mom, having seen the movie many times and spent an equal number of hours combing through Amish barns, looking for rare treasures, remarked, “That guy’s not married.”

“How can you tell?” Donna asked.

Jeff shot me a look in the rear view that said, with a roll of his eyes, “Here we go.”

“Well it’s easy. Amish men aren’t allowed to grow beard until they get married,” Mom explained.

“I heard something like that.” The hook has been set.

“Yes, they’re very strict about marriage, and sex. That’s why they’re always building barns.”

“Huh, I don’t get it.”

“Well, they believe – if ‘believe’ is the right word – that those activities should be kept outside, out of the purity of the home; since it’s kind of an ‘animal’ thing that you’re doing. So they have to do it outside.”

“I knew they were backwards, but come on.”

Jeff looked back again, “Mom’s reeling her in.”

“Now some families, just starting out, don’t have barns yet, so they have to go in the buggies. Have you noticed that there are two kinds of buggies? The ‘convertibles’ like that guy was driving are for single men, so the folks can keep an eye on him. The ‘hard tops’ are for married people, so they can have ‘alone time’.”

By this time Donna was at the rail; Mom had the gaffing hook ready.

“But just to keep everything ‘flowing’ throughout the community, they have to do it while the buggy is moving. You know they can’t have buggies stopped all over Lancaster County while people are screwing. It would be bad for the tourism, plus the traffic would be terrible. So, Donna, if you ever see a hardtop buggy, and it looks like no one is driving …”

The Gods of Coincidence smiled on us. At that exact moment, we passed such a vehicle. The driver was sitting well to the back, so it looked like it was on auto-pilot.

“Oh … my … God.,” Donna was equally fascinated, embarrassed and exasperated, “They’re …?”

“Yep.”

Get the net.

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Harrisburg is a little further west, down the Turnpike from Lancaster, but it’s great country, especially if you ride. Bikes (road or mountain), cycles (cruisers, choppers, or motocross), horses, it doesn’t matter, this is great riding country.

I first heard of Tröegs HopBack Amber Ale, from an ad in DirtRag magazine. It’s really good, comparable to Magic Hat Blind Faith. It has a great rich amber color, a thick creamy head, not too fizzy. It has some nice orange, mango flavors, with a sharp hoppiness, I always enjoy.

I had a couple after a wonderfully sloppy ride on my home trails. It was a nice warmer, after getting out of my cedar swamp water soaked and pine-needled gear.

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posted Feb-23-2006 04:26 PM            

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posted Feb-24-2006 10:20 AM               

I did go buy Lost Sailor, per last Friday's advice, but now I'm sick and think I'd appreciate it more if my throat didn't feel like someone stuffed a sock into it. Not that I'm philosophically opposed to drinking beer while sick, I just think I'd miss out. I wanted to try the Juniper Pale Ale mentioned but our local Liquors 44 (aka The Most Singularly Depressing Place to Buy Alcohol on Earth/Corporate Division) didn't carry that particular version. I think Liquors 44 might be a Massachusetts thing, but seriously, they couldn't vacuum or open a window or something or throw some paint on the walls? The whole place is lit up in flourescent fog and smells like my Freshman dorm, where the floor was sticky with Old Milwaukee or whatever cr@p we were drinking, and they haven't updated their sign graphics since the 70's. I'm a poor grad student and I'm stuck with them, though.

So back to my beer purchases last Friday: I also bought Harpoon UFO. It seemed like an out of season choice, what with the cheery packaging and the light and lemony flavor, but it kind of took me out of February and that was really nice. I like drinking and eating kind of seasonally for a bunch of reasons, one of which is that you get a chance to miss (for example) pinot grigio when you don't drink it all winter long and then it shows up again in June, ready to hang out for the summer months. Or is it heretical to mention wine in the beer thread? Anyway, in this case it did seem not quite in place with the season, but in a nice way.

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posted Feb-24-2006 10:37 AM               

Yes! I've literally stood poised while sick with an opener resting on the cap of a beer thinking "should I?.... should I???" If I've planned ahead though, I have some good dry stout around - as much for the historically proven placebo effect as for any significant good it will do me.

And wine's great from time to time. I still don't know my wines very well, but I know what I like when I taste it.

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posted Feb-24-2006 10:49 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by RunMonkey:
... our local Liquors 44 (aka The Most Singularly Depressing Place to Buy Alcohol on Earth/Corporate Division) ...

... they couldn't vacuum or open a window or something or throw some paint on the walls? The whole place is lit up in flourescent fog and smells like my Freshman dorm, where the floor was sticky with Old Milwaukee or whatever cr@p we were drinking, and they haven't updated their sign graphics since the 70's ....

It seemed like an out of season choice, what with the cheery packaging and the light and lemony flavor, but it kind of took me out of February and that was really nice.

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Wow, you're good.

Cheers and welcome.

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